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Stephanie Yap
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Wednesday, April 15, 2009

just what have gotten into me deep inside?

i noe it doesnt have to be in this way.
yet my heart still drift.

i should refrain, i dont want to be in this way.
perhaps i looked too highly upon myself.
im hurt much more than u guys can think of.
but im hurt much much more than i thought .

for the past few months, i refrained alot.
many cruel words came out from my mouth few mths ago.
yet these cruel words seems to be saying myself few months later.

i self declared im not a good gf.
i dont know how to love him.
as saying is easier than doing.
i rejected him. i rejected everyone. i rejected myself.

is this really destined?
that i cant walk out of my shadow?
that i will carry this shadow with me the rest of my life?

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1:27 AM